sylviaolsen

Happy anniversary, my love

After living with Tex for a couple of years, Yetsa, my teenage granddaughter asked him, “Tex, what’s wrong with my grandmother?”

Never having married, never having children, never spending time with wonderfully gorgeous teenage girls (at least not since he was a teenager), he awkwardly said, “Nothing.”

“Then why don’t you marry her?” she asked.

I have never heard his answer. But not long after Tex and I were planning a wedding. We had a party. Music. Dancing. Loving family. Good friends. Delicious food.

Tex sung “Pretty Woman.” What else could a woman want at her wedding?

When we said “I do” it was a promise that we would go the distance with each other. It was easier for us to believe than when you make that promise and are looking 40 or 50 years into the future. Tex was 68 and I was 62. Previously Tex had plans to spend his aging years travelling, something he’d done all his life. Previously I had plans to spend my aging years writing, creating and engaging with my children and grandchildren, something I’d done most of my life. It wasn’t hard to make our goals compatible.

Going the distance also meant “in sickness and in health”. I think we said that in our vows although I can’t remember and I can’t find them. Two and a half years later, on March 12, 2020, the day after the first major public announcement Tex and I came down with COVID. I had the nasty but manageable variant. Tex had the killer type. But he lived and still lives with a long-COVID heart condition. Since then he has had two new hips and is hopefully waiting for a fix for his feet that have lost most of their ability to navigate.

This “Happy Anniversary” message is to report on the “for better and for worse” part of our vows. I’m also pretty sure we said something like that. It is for better. Expectations are softened by acquiescence. Having fun is as simple as a game of Wordle. Finding the word in three tries is cause enough for celebration. Getting old together is a gift.

Weddings are public demonstrations of love and commitment. Anniversaries, along with blogs and Facebook, are a wonderful opportunity to publicly recommit and restate that love.

Happy anniversary, my love.

sylviaolsen

Celebrating Tex and Sylvia love

Happy anniversary, my love. Six years ago Tex McLeod and I got married. We had a wonderful party. Outside. At the art school just up the road from our home. Family and friends ate, drank, danced, hugged, laughed and enjoyed a loving day. That was it. Our wedding was love.

Neither Tex nor I remembered that today was our anniversary. Janet Dunnett, a dear friend who attended the wedding, sent me a message. Recelebrating. Thanks Janet I’m not sure if either one of us would have remembered.

Our lives are still full of love. Family love. Our eight dynamic grandchildren no longer range in age from 1 to 20. More than half of them are young adults full of more love for their old grandparents than I could ever have thought possible.

Friends love. Old friends, like Janet, have become more important. New friends have shown up. And how sweet it is to make new friends at our age.

And then there’s puppy love. We got Piper 6 months after our wedding. Odelia and Neekah said they couldn’t take care of a dog and would we like her? Hesitantly we said yes we’d like her. We had no idea how deeply we would love our curly haired little dog.

Days like anniversaries remind us that we aren’t in control of our lives. We didn’t know what was in store for us. Our plans were wild possibilities at the most. Hopes and dreams at the least.

You’d think by our age we would know how to make decisions. But sometimes I think we are no better at it than our teenage grandsons. We’ve made some good and some bad decisions in our short marriage. I never imagined I would be making breakfast and changing sheets at a Lodge on Saturna Island. But what started out perhaps as not such a good decision turned into a wonderful new adventure.

And then there was COVID. Long-term COVID. Two new hips. Feet that don’t work. One of our new friends said “Tex you are like an old car I used to have.” Sort of funny. But not really.

Today we are celebrating Tex and Sylvia love. Thanks to Janet we are able to remember. Thanks for her words “I hope the summer manifested its heart to you both, and didn’t wear you down.” 

The summer was good to us. Our feet hurt but our hearts are full. It has been a good ride, Tex McLeod. You is an amazing gift. I am so privileged to be able to share my life with my person. The one who has my back and stays by my side no matter what. That’s love.